3

In a blink of a candle light flame we flickered like designated memories meant to tail away with time. See we used to love, and cherish, and flourish, blossomed cheeks pressed against each other. So much hope it felt dangerous, so must trust it felt like a lie, for every time we went into our worlds to test the patience of time. Your tongue it was as red as a swell from a burn, and you filled the jars inside of me.

2

If there's a god, tell him where I am. One in a billion souls, just another faceless human that roams the earth. I am pleading for him to pick me up and love me, because I can never do that. And I am weak, and have fallen to the deceptions of this earth, but mostly I am tired. Bones they are breaking, my heart is shattering, my only hope is depleting. If there's a god, tell me where he is. Take her life, take all from me, just take me this time and let's end it all.

Maybe I'm just in love when you wake me up

It's been an incredibly long time since I've blogged, or let's just say even gone back to my old love Blogger. I've always liked writing so I don't which part of me died and stopped this habit, but I'm starting it again. 4AM and I just ended a phone call which had several bits of emotions on the far end thrown in, not too long ago. Promised to chat on FB msg but she died so it's O.K. Thank you Rachael, for being there for me at three in the morning, for being there for me ever since the day we became friends. I fucking love you for everything you are and I honestly have no idea where I'd be without you. I love you.


I haven't been staying up recently but tonight's a little different so here I am with my ramblings, with Ed Sheeran on replay. Did plenty of things today to keep my mind busy. Cleared the second shelf of my table and rearranged everything and added these lovely IKEA berry scented candles in their shot glasses as decor. Vacuumed, mopped, scrubbed the toilet, caught Revolutionary Road during lunch and Post Grad for dinner. The fried fish noodles from the ban mian store in toa payoh central is kickass. I shifted the mini coffee table from my balcony to my room too, and cleared all my laundry.


I learned a couple of things about myself today. Like how incredibly distracted I am when it comes to housework, though probably those who know me well enough know my distractions go way further than housework. How I have become immuned to Pitbull's cries for his Juliet and how it has become a habit for me to always, always look before turning around the corner of my hall because I know he'll come galloping just to probably feel satisfied in being faster than his owner. Also, that Ed Sheeran's is probably the only singer I've had on repeat non-stop for the longest time and still not gotten sick of.


And something I realized about myself today is that perhaps I'm not that strong deep down inside after all. There's a lot of explanation for such a cliche statement such as that, but I guess I'll save that for another time.

"What you do with your life is really just one half of the equation. The other half, the more important half really is, who you're with when you're doing it." - Post Grad